Tess of True(ish) Story recommended a book to me: Mistakes Were Made (But Not By ME): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts, by Carol Travis and Elliot Aronson. If you like books about why people act the way they do, you will eat this up.
I found it both stress-relieving and stress-inducing. On one hand, it explains in a way that makes perfect sense why someone will defend an illogical position and will continue to do so as if they can't even hear the good arguments against it, and this may relieve some of your frustration and bewilderment. On the other hand, it points out that you do the same kind of thing.
On one hand, it explains why your friend talked about how awesome her marriage was until the day she changed her tune and talked only about how much it has always sucked and was never right. On the other hand, it points out that you do the same kind of thing.
On one hand, it explains why politicians will make COLOSSAL errors and NEVER admit it. On the other hand, it points out that you do the same kind of thing.
I appreciated the kind and understanding tone of the book. It's not saying "You idiots!," it's saying that what people do is absolutely natural and understandable. It even defends people who seem to be lying, saying they're NOT lying---they actually believe what they're saying to be true.
The problem is that once you understand the authors' idea, you will wonder how to make OTHER PEOPLE see the situation. And as the authors point out, there isn't any way to do that. The best you can do is try to reduce your OWN tendencies to justify your wrong actions/arguments, and that is a little unsatisfying when you've just been led to see how wrong the actions/arguments of OTHERS are. Perhaps you could buy them all a copy of this book for Christmas.
Gift ideas for an 8-year-old, part 1 of 2 - I have TWO 8-year-olds to buy for, so I’m going to split it up into two posts. Today will be the things we’re getting for Edward. I dislike saying “Gift id...